27 tylanol and 12 advil and a very badly cut up body from a razor blade to her leg. "I just got sick." she told me, watching for my reaction.
So this is what she was debating whether or not she was going to tell me.
All of this hurt and pain, all for what? Because she and her friend are in a fight. How sad. I scrounged around in the church youth room where we were sitting eating together, and eventually found what I was looking for. "This will work." I said as I handed her a small journal. "What's this for?" "homework." was my response. "My reaction for you is to give you homework." We had finished our Wendy's meals while she told me the why's and when's of her story. With only our drinks left it was my turn to talk.
"This is your new journal. It has a purpose to it. And this, is your new red pen. When you hurt, you cut yourself and bleed red. That red blood shows you your pain and hurt and frustration. Now I am giving you red ink. Ink to replace the blood. Everytime you want to cut yourself, you pour out your hurt and pain in red ink in this journal instead. There is more. In the back of this journal I want you to write at least five eternal, totally stable truths. These are unwavering things that are true no matter what, and are the reasons why you should live. One example is this :You are loved. Here is another: There is a very exciting purpose for your life that you will want to see. Those reasons. When you feel like there is no reason to go through this pain, you read those truths, and remember."
She cried, we talked some more, we hugged, we finished our drinks.
And so life goes on.